In a comment on a friend's post, something that's been bugging me finally came together in my head.

In various recent events (Peter Watts' Squidgate, the g20 mess, etc.), there has been a bunch of commenters (live and on the net, natch) who seem to cheer louder the more it looks like the police have abused thier power. These are the folks who say things like "if a cop tells you to do something, you do it *immediately* or you deserve what happens to you", "if you haven't worn a uniform, you don't get to complain", etc.

The general idea of Authoritarian Apologism is that anyone that gets beaten up by the police, or the border guards, or anyone with a bade or a uniform, deserves what they get. That those forces are always justified in whatever they do to thier citizens.

I've been trying to figure out what it is that drives me so nuts about this position, besides the obvious. It finally clicked today - it's the same logical fallacy that drives Rape Culture victim-blaming and shunning of people who are ill. It's the idea that Bad things don't happen to Good people. So when bad things happen to someone previously presumed to be Good, the Apologist makes the inference that the person must be Bad. Because the alternative is that Bad things *do* happen to Good people. And that's terrifying - the Apologist naturally sees zirself as a Good person. If something bad can happen to some random writer, to some random jogger or random tourist, then it means that something bad can happen to *me*!

And a lot of people can't face that. So they go to great lengths to come up with reasons why people deserve to be beaten by cops, to be raped by thier "friend", to get cancer or AIDS. I mean, of course that guy deserved to be arrested and held in a pen in the rain overnight with no drinking water - did you *see* what he was wearing? He was *asking* for it! Good thing I'd never do something like that, so I'm safe.

It's all about Othering victims so that the Apologist can feel safe knowing that bad things only happen to bad people. It's about fear, and letting that fear make your world ever smaller.


Leftover steak, grilled zucchini and mushrooms with bread. Mmm, meat! Lizard has been on a grilling kick lately (with our indoor electric grill). I am happy to continue to enjoy the results.


Album: Zoe Keating's Into The Trees

Genre: Neo-Classical?

Similar Bands: Attrition are occasionally vaguely similar.

Review: Something not Industrial! There aren't even any drums! I loved Keatings first album, and I love this one. I kept catching myself drumming my fingers and tapping my toes to recollections of this album in the past week, even when I wasn't listening to it. The album includes a live track - it's a credit to Keating that I couldn't tell which one without looking at the track listing.

For those who aren't familiar with Zoe's work, she plays cello, with live looping, so she's able to essentially replicate the effect of having several cellists playing simultaneously, by herself, live. It's gorgeous, haunting, beautiful music.

Playlist Potential: Possible candidates for meditation, driving mixes and bedtime.
curgoth: (Default)
( Jun. 27th, 2010 01:33 am)
For those on my flist not in Toronto, a super brief summary.

There's been protesting, rioting, violence by thugs on both sides. I avoided it, though a northerly shift meant I saw the police getting ready on my way to buy fabric.

I and all my peoples are safe.

I am hoping tomorrow will be quieter.
curgoth: (sick)
( Jun. 26th, 2010 05:37 pm)
Beta colony is open for dropins tonight. Feeling the urge to have my peoples around. Show up any time after 6 or so.
A list of ongoing creative sewing projects, in no particular order;

  • Great sarong tie review; I have grown gradually fatter since I started wearing sarongs, so the older the sarong, the shorter the ties. The older ones are now too shrot to wear. So, I need to sew on longer ties to the older ones. also, the black sarong I got last year has no ties at all on it.

  • Make two new satin cravats. I have the material, just need to rearrange the living room so that I have the space to measure and cut.

  • Fix both pairs of thai fisherman's pants. The bigger pair have a gaping crotch hole that needs to get patched. Thankfully, the pants came in a bag of the same material, so I have somethign to patch with. The other pair just need to get some sitching replaced.

  • Sew buttons on to pinstripe pants. This is for attaching button braces to. I also need to get at least one more set of button braces.

  • Steampunk Kscope outfit. I'm thinking sarong-weight double-breasted waistcoat over wrap pants or a sarong, big boots, bandana, goggles and leather cuffs. Maybe a cravat, and maybe a standalone collar to go with it above the waistcoat. And the bat-utility belt, of course. Sketching will hopefully happen at lunch time today.

  • polar fleece arm-warmers. These have been sitting in the sewing bin for probably close to two years at this point.

  • Utility belt. Needs more grommets, another pair of pouches and two more belt loops. Also considering making a removable larger pouch to hang down one side to put a paperback in.

  • Raven hoodie. Black hoodie with a raven cut out from an old t-shirt, plus glow in the dark skull and crossbones patches on the arms. I want to lengthen the sleeves with some sort of black and white stripe pattern. Do I want to use alternating strips of black and white sweatshirt material to match the hoodie? Will that result in the white getting greyed out when the hoodie gets washed? What about using white spray paint or screen printing ink to add white stripes to black? I suspect that I will continue to add bits and pieces as I find more neat stuff to sew on to it over time.

  • I should also make a pair or two of gaiters to wear over combat boots etc. They'd also be useful when biking, as long as I made them snug enough.

  • black flannel hakama; because 7 layers of flannel should keep me warm pretty much anywhere... Again, I have the material and a pattern, but no space to lay out the pattern, etc. Also, i still suck at using patterns.

curgoth: (Default)
( Jun. 16th, 2010 11:05 pm)
Since I now have a new ipod, that means it is yet again time to interview my ipod!

Another Meme...this ones about random music...

1. Go to your media player/mp3 player and put it all on shuffle.
2. Say the following questions aloud, and after each one press play.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question.

What do you think of me, iPod?
Soilbleed (Obszoen Geschoepf Remix) by Grendel.

This track opens with the sample "I am in a world of shit". So clearly, the OokPod thinks I'm in trouble.

Will I have a happy life?
30 Ghosts IV by Nine Inch Nails.

My life will be filled with ghosts? Or ambient music tracks? I'm not sure that sounds "happy" exactly.

What do my friends really think of me?
The Only One by Abney Park.

My friends think I am the only one? The only one what? The only one who rocks the socks of of the fox? The only one that doesn't know how much I smell? You're a tease, OokPod.

Do people secretly lust after me?
I Cry by Rotersand.

Okay, OokPod, you're just being mean now. Or are you crying because everyone lusts after me, and not you? Don't be sad, OokPod - I think you're sexy.

How can I make myself happy?
Back and Forth by Dr. Steel.

OokPod, you either think that I am very easily amused, or you have a dirty mind.

What should I do with my life?
The Real by Tech Itch w/ Don Davis.

So I shouldn't bury my head in imaginary worlds all the time? That's sound advice, I suppose.

Why must life be so full of pain?
I Am Cow by The Arrogant Worms.

So, I gather that you are an advocate of Veganism, then, OokPod?

How can I maximize my pleasure during sex?
Wicked Dickie.

Well, I think that settles the question of whether or not OokPod has a dirty mind. That or a very unfortunate fashion sense.

Will I ever have children?
Dozen Girls by The Damned.

OokPod, that's pretty unlikley. And that's a lot of kids.

Will I die happy?
Lost by Rotersand.

Don't spoil the final episode! I haven't seen it yet!

Can you give me some advice?
Bionic by Placebo.

Does that mean you think I *should* get Lasik?

What do you think happiness is?
Space Seed [live] by S.P.O.C.K.

Yes, OokPod definitely has a dirty mind.

What's my favorite fetish?

Queen of the Delta by Vernian Process.

OokPod thinks that I am into cross-dressers from New Orleans, I gather? In the final analysis, you and I haven't known each other that long, OokPod. I can see you've got a lot to learn about how we run things around here. But the dirty mind will certainly help.
curgoth: (Default)
( Jun. 16th, 2010 10:03 pm)
via [ profile] stillsostrange

1. Reply to this post and I'll assign you a letter.
2. List 5 songs that start with that letter.
3. Post them to your journal with these instructions.

[ profile] stillsostrange gave me "R".

  1. Rainbow Disconnection by Sad Kermit. Because even muppets get sad sometimes.

  2. Rats by Rasputina (Yes, [ profile] corwin77, clicking that link is a bad idea. Contains rats. In fact, no one watch the video, just minimize it and listen tot he song.)

  3. Re:Your Brains by Jonathan Coulton. I think I've been in meetings with the protag from this song.

  4. Red Right Hand by Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds. This song always makes me think of the old 90s TV show American Gothic. Which I think was only watched by me. Every time I hear this song I picture Gary Cole in a dusty black coat with stacks of green paper in his red right hand. Also, lookit the pretty pre-moustache Nick Cave!

  5. Romulan Ale by S.P.O.C.K. While looking through youtube, I found an utterly devastating fanvid for Rasptutina's "A Quitter", so I needed something silly to cheer me up. Couldn't find it online, sadly. S.P.O.C.K. are highly goofy.


A can of maple baked beans, two slices of 3 cheese bread, and a salad with honey mustard dressing. Not bad, but the dressing and the beans did not go well together.


Album: Modulate's Detonation

Genre: More Aggrotech

Similar Bands: See previous list of Aggrotech bands.

Review: Uh, I owe Terrorfakt an apology. I complained at length on last week's download about how Skullfucker didn't sound like the club track I liked. Well, the reason for that is that the track I liked was Modulate's Skullfuck. Which has nothing to do with Terrorfakt. Mea culpa. I do sort of wonder how it has come to pass that I listen to music where there is enough songs about skull-fucking to engender confusion about them.

So, anyway, I now have the track I wanted. There's a very NSFW video for it here.

As far as the actual album goes, it's decent. Heavy beats, highly club-friendly. A little on the poppish/bro-friendly side, but not overly so. Aggressive, energetic stuff. Includes such genre standards as "heavy beat with samples from Full Metal Jacket" and "heavy beat with computer voice talking about sex."

Playlist Potential: Hard & Dirty and Skullfuck are both workout and driving mix contenders.


June 10, 2010;
One of [ profile] neeuqdrazil's magic vegan soups from Stitch and Bitch. Veggie stock, macaroni, chickpeas, fake chicken, spinach and dried mushrooms. Yummy, and at least this time there's some veggies in my lunch. I added some hot sauce, and had a glass of milk with it.


Album: Terrorfakt's Teethgrinder

Genre: Aggrotech

Similar Bands: ... just go look in previous posts at all the aggrotech bands there.

Review: I bought this album because I wanted something heavy, and I liked what I had heard of Terrorfakt's Skullfucker in podcasts. Much like Memmaker's Energon3, apparently the album version of SKullfucker is instrumental and does not in fact feature samples of Gunnery Sgt. R. Lee Emory from Full Metal Jacket. Unlike the Memmaker album, I wasn't that impressed with the rest of the album either. My main impression was boredom. It wasn't *bad* exactly, I think it is just that I had certain expectations.

I am started to get frustrated with tracks that are awesome remixed but kind of dull in the original. More frustrating is that I generally can't find any legal way to get the better versions online - itunes certainly doesn't have them, so except for situations where the remixing band gives the track away online for free, my only options are trying to hunt down obscure compilations and find a way to get the physical disc shipped to me, or trying to grab it illegally online. Given that a big part of the 52 weeks of music and lunch project is to get more music without acquiring space-filling junk, and to actually pay artists for their work, I'm not happy.

Playlist Potential: Meh. It's good filler for generic dance stuff.


Friday June 4

Leftovers from last night's dinner from The Pantry, which is sort of a yuppie cafeteria. You go up to the counter and order stuff off of plates. Lunch ended up being a corn fritter with duck in it, a sweet potato and bacon cake, some potato leek bread pudding, herb-stuffed chicken, heirloom beet salad with pine nuts and a bit of fish cake. I'm not hugely fond of the fish cake, but the rest is wonderful. I could use something green in here, but I didn't feel like rapini last night.

I'm also having a St. Ambroise apricot wheat ale with lunch.


Album: Unter Null's The Failure Epiphany

Genre Electro-Industrial

Similar Bands: :wumpscut:, Android Lust, Grendel

Review: I really liked this album. I walked around with it on repeat for two days before I felt the need to listen to something else. Dark, energetic beats with the edge of paranoid unease that I so love in Industrial music.

One odd thing I noticed - Unter Null is a one-woman band. Most of her vocals, though, are so heavily distorted that it's very hard to guess the gender of the vocalist. While heavy vocal distortion is common in Industrial music, I wonder if the gender-masking is intentional. While listening to an industrial podcast, one of the DJs (male) talked about being charmed by Unter Null's dulcet tones. The female DJ responded with confusion, given the level of vocal distortion used. There's something odd in there about the expectation of a woman to be "pretty" even when she's growling into a microphone about violence and unhappiness.

That's sort of beside the point, though. This is a strong album from a solid artist, and I plan to get more Unter Null in the future.

Playlist Potential: Workout for sure. Possible candidates for driving mixes, and any sort of dance/club type mixes.
curgoth: (Default)
( Jun. 5th, 2010 03:58 pm)
[ profile] mycrazyhair and I went to Opera Atelier's surplus costume sale.

[ profile] mycrazyhair found something:
Her Majesty


Last week I ended up at home three days. Lunches included chips w/ refried beans and salsa, KD, and leftover ribs.


Album: Hanzel Und Gretyl's Uber Alles

Genre Industrial Metal

Similar Bands: Nanochrist, Ministry?

Review: Hanzel Und Gretyl are an ironic joke band. They are fake Germans (from New York, IIRC), fake Nazis, and fake Space Tyrants. Their songs include a fair bit of bad German, and a few Nazi references. Despite knowing that it's all a joke, I found the space nazi stuff uncomfortable. Not that I think anyone really thinks "Third Reich From the Sun" is a serious call for intergalactic aryan conquest, but it still squicks me. That said, musically, HUG are fairly solid. I grabbed this album on the strength of S.S. Death Star Supergalactik, which is exactly what it sounds like. Heavy beats, shouty vocals and loud guitars. At times, I found it a bit too metal for me; I walked away from metal back in the late 90s.

Playlist Potential S.S. Death Star Supergalactik is already on Wokrout and Workout(heavy). A couple other tracks might find their way on to both playlists.
curgoth: (Default)
( Jun. 4th, 2010 12:41 pm)

18.Issola by Steven Brust

Cosmic Vlad is cosmic. Also, *sniff*. Chronologically, this is as far as I got when I initially read the Vlad books.

19.More Eric Meyer On CSS by Eric Meyer

Eric Meyer's a pretty good writer, and I am interested in CSS. However, my last big drive to learn a pile of CSS a few years ago covered most of the new techniques Meyer presents, so I mostly got some incremental improvements to my skill set. Also, it reminded me why I stopped getting excited about CSS and web design - to make pretty designs you really need to be either a good artist, a good photographer, or have access to a really nice stock photo library. Next time I'm doing web design I'll probably be glad for all the IE bug workarounds from this, though.

20.Athyra by Steven Brust

Paternal Vlad is... not so paternal actually. Hi Dee Hi Dee Ho la. Step on out.

21.Orca by Steven Brust

Financial Vlad is financial. Surprise endings! (not that surprising if you were paying attention)

22.Dragon by Steven Brust

Military Vlad is military. Some day I think I might work up something about the never-ending fantasy series and the apparent need for one installment wherein the hero enlists. Vlad does it, Tavi of Calderon does it, and I'm sure comparisons can be pulled out for Miles Vorkosigan and Harry Dresden, too. Tangentially, there's also a common theme of premise threat and having it followed through late in the series, but that's a different post that requires spoiler warnings and footnotes. Some times I just need to remind myself that I always hated writing essays in school.

23.Ink-Stained Amazons and Cinematic Warriors by Jennifer K. Stuller

My Fandom Has a Publisher! This is a great book. Stuller writes from what seems to me to be a distinctly fannish meets academia POV. The book examines female heroes in comics, movies and TV. It covers how they're portrayed in contrast with male heroes, where they succeed and fail from a feminist perspective, and how the archetype of the female hero is forming. I especially like the parts about how the female hero's journey (in constrast to the Conradian hero's journey) is shaping up in popular culture. This is, in a lot of ways, the book I had been hoping for with Mike Madrid's book on femlae superheroes in the last booklog post. Stuller's language use is interesting - she uses feminist/academic terms fairly casually, but also uses what I think of as fan language - "The Scoobies", "Uber-whatever", etc. All in all, I am quite happy that I picked this up. It's given me a lot to think about, especially for gaming and writing female heroes.

So, my next Vlad books will be ones I actually haven't read before. Next up, Dzur, followed by Jhegaala. Then I have to wait for paperbacks. I should probably head to chapters and put in my next order...

Cory Doctorow coming to Toronto this Friday

I am not sure if I'm going to go to this. My Friday's more or less open at this point, though, so it's a definite possibility.


Friday May 21, 2010
Chicken sandwich. Two think slices of PC Potato Scallion bread, a chicken breast left over from Wednesday's rotisserie chicken dinner, with sweet with heat mustard and a mug of milk to drink.

I love that bread more than is wise. As a meal, it could have used a side of vegetables.


Album: Zombie Girl's Blood, Brains and Rock n' Roll

Genre: Industrial? ZG's other album is more clearly in the Aggrotech/Electro-Industrial area, but this one is a bit more rock.

Similar Bands: Well, half of Zombie Girl is Sebastian Komor of Combichrist and Komor Kommando, and that influence definitely shows, though this album isn't nearly as beat heavy as either of those bands. The "horror songs" aspect to it recalls Voltaire and Rob Zombie with a lot of callbacks to classic horror movie soundtracks and the occasional touch that feels like something from a Danny Elfman soundtrack.

Review: Honestly, I liked Back From the Dead much more. I miss the heavy beats. I saw Zombie Girl in, I think, 2007 during the tour for Blood, Brains and Rock n' Roll at the zombie-themed Dark Rave. While it's defintely listenable, it did not blow my mind, then or now. Still, I can't say my collection didn't need more zombie rock.

Playlist Potential: Nothing screams out to be added to any of my playlists just yet.
curgoth: (Default)
( May. 26th, 2010 10:38 am)
[ profile] neeuqdrazil and I are thinking about going camping on the weekend of July 17/18. Any suggestions on where good places to go are? We went to Rockwood last year, and while it was nice, we feel like we pretty much did everythign to do there last time. We also ended up having the flodo lights from the bathrooms pointing at our camp site, so our spot was overly well lit for camping.
I think I will stop putting LJ cuts on these. Do people have an opinion on that either way?


Chickpea soup, leftover from one of the many soups that [ profile] neeuqdrazil tends to make for Stitch and Bitch. As is my wont, I added cajun spice. Yummy and filling.


Album: Ego Likeness' Breedless

Genre: Darkwave all the way. "Darkwave" is more or less what you call goth music made after 1990. Heavier on synths and drum machines with less guitar than the goths who came before.

Similar Bands: Crüxshadows, The Birthday Massacre, earlier Abney Park, Autumn.

Review: It was nice to get back to my gothy roots for a bit. [ profile] tickly_girl posted a video of Ego Likeness a while back after she saw them at a con, and I was intrigued enough to go find a bunch of free live tracks that the band had up. EL has great female vocals that remind me of Autumn (I have no idea how obscure Autumn are - I saw them at Hallowmas in 1999). The lyrics have nice mythic references, and just enough angst. The music demands standing on a hilltop at night during a full moon, brooding. Not that I have ever done anything like that. While not as aggessively driven as a lot of the other stuff I've picked up lately, Ego Likeness is definitely very dance-worthy. Just the thing to dust off your "unscrew the light bulb" and "lost a contact lens" moves. I defintely enjoyed this album, and fully intend to pick up more of thier stuff later.

Playlist Potential: I need some sort of goth/darkwave smart playlist. I just need to work out how to tag everything properly.


Pasta with chicken, spinach and sun-dried tomato. And a little chicen stock to round out the sauce. Delicious! And the leftovers ended up having a lot of chicken, since it had drifted to the bottom of the pot when we first made it. So, yummy AND healthy.


Album:'s R.E.T.R.O.

Genre: Is C64 pop a genre? Video game bleep/bloop music.

Similar Bands: Stuff from the demo scene - blockparty type stuff. Vaguely similar to Ladytron and Freezepop.

Review: I yet again picked up an album based on a track I heard via @ISNradio; "8 Bits Are Enough For ME". The rest of the album is less club-friendly, but still good stuff. It bleeps and bloops, and there are heavily vocodered lyrics on many of the tracks. It's a lot less aggressive than most of my music, and more comtemplative. It doesn't have the momentum that psytrance music has. Which, come to think of it, may contribute to my frustrating discovery at Notacon that hackers do not dance.

Playlist Potential: Not quite sure. A couple tracks might be candidates for Bedtime. I don't really have a good niche for bleep-bloop stuff as yet. 8 Bits should probably be on a driving mix.
The Food

Oyako Don Buri; again, chicken and egg in soy sauce broth over rice. This time we supplemented with veggies stir fried with sake and light soy sauce.

Adding in the veggies really rounds out the meal. I think we did a better job with the broth this time 'round, too.

The Music

Album: And One's Bodypop

Genre: EBM/Synthpop.

Similar Bands: Several of the songs could pass for Depeche Mode in dim light. Other similar bands include Covenant and Beborn Beton.

Review: I grabbed this album because it has club hit Military Fashion Show on it. I've had mixed success with And One in the past - on the strength of Get You Closer and thier remix of Project Pitchfork's Timekiller, I picked up Anguish, and was underwhelmed. Bodypop, however, delivers exactly what the album title promises - dancable synth pop. Light and fun, at least for the kind of music I listen to - this isn't Kylie Mingue or Lady Gaga.

Playlist Potential: Military Fashion Show will probably start creeping in all over. The rest will just be a good background for the Oontz Oontz and Doof Doof playlists.
Everyone has things they blog about. Everyone has things they don't blog about. Challenge me out of my comfort zone by telling me something I don't blog about, but you'd like to hear about, and I'll write a post about it. Ask about anything: latest movie watched, last book read, political leanings, if there's anything you've ever wondered or been curious about or meant to ask me, etc. Re-post this in your own journal so that we can all learn more about each other.


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